Tips for Living in Your First Post Grad Place

It has been more than a month since I moved into my first postgraduate apartment with my boyfriend of five years. While this is an essentially something everyone will eventually go through, and I know I am new at this, however, in this short month of being “on my own” I have learned several tricks that I think made the transition easier. Now, I will share that with you in hopes of helping you eventually make that transition too.

1.    Create a Budget (and Stick to it): This may seem daunting, but it will help you keep your finances organized. You can find template online or create your one, but generally you want to track your income vs. your expenses.

2.    Cut out expenses you don’t need: There are many things we purchase on a regular basis that we don’t need. For example, as many of us girls do, I love clothes! However, it is not practical to spend hundreds of dollars on clothes when you have other things (such as rent and student loans) to pay for. While the occasional purchase is not always bad, generally speaking it is always better to spend money when and where it is needed, not frivolously.

3.     Save. Save. Save:  The days of having 10 bucks in your bank account is no longer something that should occur. Save as much money as you can. In the end, it will be worth it (literally).

4.    Set a day each week to do your chores. From vacuuming to laundry, there is a lot to do to keep your place tidy and company ready. By picking one day (and making it the same day every week) it will become a habit.

5.    Plan your meals a week ahead, that way when you go food shopping, you are really prepared and will not by unnecessary things. Additionally, always bring a physical list; it will help you stay organized and on target!

Whether you are still in college or already graduated there will come a time where moving out with be a reality. Hopefully, when that time approaches you can refer to what you read here. In addition, here are some additional tips for your convenience.  

Sisters and Chainsaws and Clowns, Oh My!

I know that those lyrics typically correlate to a Christmas song, but I can't help but love Halloween. Halloween, besides Thanksgiving and Christmas, is my favorite holiday.

I love the thrill of facing some of the things that scare you the most. In my case, chainsaws and clowns are a whole lot of nope but this past weekend, some of my sisters and I went to face two of the most talked about haunted houses in Colorado: The 13th Floor and The Asylum.

In both of these haunted houses, I had to face my biggest fear with chainsaws. Naturally, I know what I get myself into each time I decide to step foot inside of a haunted house but somehow, I still find myself screaming and running in a full-on sprint once I reach the terrifying sound of a chainsaw.

Other than that, we had the time of our lives. Each haunted house had it's own smaller haunted house before the main attraction which my sisters and I so wonderfully dubbed, "The Warm Up."

From the time that we left The 13th Floor to the time we got to The Asylum, one of my sisters and her biological sister decided not to join us for the latter, leaving only three of us to conquer the final haunted house for the evening.

Two of us were (and probably still are) like small children; We were easily terrified but we manned up and we went first and second in our small group of three.

After all of the laughing, running, and screaming, I can easily say that my sisters help me face my fears. While I know that the clowns and chainsaws aren't real, they still terrify me. My sisters, as I say every week, are such a huge support and even though it's just something silly like going into a haunted house, they give me the courage to take these steps in my life.

I'm excited to say that in two weeks, we're going to visit The 13th Floor again for blackout night. Blackout Night is where you go with friends and the entire gets one glowstick. No other lights, just the glowstick, and from what I heard, the actors can take it away from you, leaving you in pure darkness. If this isn't facing a huge fear, than I'm not sure what is.

Happy Fall

With Pumpkin Spice latte season in full swing and Halloween right around the corner I thought I'd share some festive fall things with you all! These are all fabulous Pinterest finds.


1. The costumes: if you're looking for a unique costume for your group of girlfriends, this social media themes costume is super cute and easy to make! 









2. Boots: I've been looking for some comfy combat boots and these just might fit the bill. Combat boots seem to be everywhere this season, definitely something to try if your looking to mix it up with your riding boots.  







3. Quote: This quote pretty much sums up my feelings about the season! The crisp air makes everything feels new. 






4. Soup: bread bowls are my favorite! This Panera copy cat recipe is perfect for snuggling up on fall days! 

What are you looking forward to trying this fall?

Philanthropy : Service Hours Matter

As sorority women we always strive to achieve the highest potential we can. Whether that includes academics, social relations, or philanthropic endeavors, we are expected to exceed expectations. Of course sometimes that may be overwhelming but at the same time, there are some of us out there who think it doesn't apply to us. We assume that the rest of the chapter will get those philanthropy hours and will pull our GPA higher, but at the end of the day the future of our chapters depends on the determination of all members as a whole. 

Philanthropy has always been my favorite aspect of sorority life. In high school, I went through a ton of life obstacles and people who I didn't even know always jumped in and helped me out. I swore when I had the chance I would return the favor and make a difference, and Kappa has given me the opportunity to do so. The problem is that many sisters think getting in service hours is a chore and what you have to do is find something to do that you love. 

I've been blessed to have military men in my family and the first big service project I worked on was something I had started in high school. A group called the Adopt A U.S. Soldier program has made itself near and dear to my heart. The program allows you to be matched with a service man or woman overseas and gives you the opportunity to write to them, send care packages, and correspond electronically to show your support. The whole experience is rewarding and I still keep up with my soldiers (all 8 and counting of them) and I have absolutely loved to contribute. 

The second opportunity I came across was the opportunity to coach cheerleading at my local recreation department. Being a cheerleader for 17 years, I wanted to jump back into the scene and this was the perfect chance. Not only did I get the community to recognize that Kappa's are out and involved around our town, but I also got to be a role model to the girls I coached. These will be out future sorority girls and we have the chance to show them what amazing women we are. 

I guess my main point is that we need to take everything a little more seriously. It's easy to do one event, have your council chairman plan it, and show up.....but it's different to get out there and make yourself know. Each one of us has the power to make a difference in our communities and our sororities outside of normal chapter wide philanthropy events. So go out there, find a cause you're passionate about, and make a change. 

(My cheer babies after their competition) 

The Light at the End of the Road

Earlier this week, Kelsey Hau, a writer for Thought Catalog, spoke about the continuous process of healing.

While reading her moving and very accurate perception of healing, I began thinking about my own healing process and how I have come to terms with all the things that happen to me.

Now I know I have referenced my first post several times now, but I have come to find that life experiences are what make us into the people that we are, for better and for worst. That being said, my healing process and accepting what has happened to me is all part of who I am and in many ways is still part of me today.

Back in May 2010 when my “father” was being sentence for both his pill addition and crimes against me, the judge sentence him for 10 years for both crimes. (Mind you, I was sexually abused for 10 years). When I was asked by the judge what I thought of the sentence, I remember saying "I don't really consider it fair, because this is going to affect me the rest of my life,"

It is true, my “father’s” abuse will always be a part of me, but through out my healing process I realized that hating him doesn’t make me a better person and in fact not hating him makes me a stronger person.

Over that past several years I have truly healed (maybe not completely- I am not delusional enough to say I don’t have some issues that can probably be linked to the abuse) from what I endured as a child by doing all the things I never thought I could while living in that abusive household. From joining my sorority to traveling the globe I have come to peace with my past by living my life the way I see fit. I have found this “inner peace” and I am a better person for it.  While what happened to me was never “okay”, I have realized that surviving it has me a better, stronger, more compassionate person. To me, that is the sign of true healing.

At this point I want to give a quick shoot out to the people who have helped me heal and to those who continue to do so (you all should know who you are). Thank you.

Being the Bridesmaid,

     My bestest most fabulous "Fig" or fake Big from my sorority got married in August. I was fortunate to be asked to be apart of her wedding! I couldn't have been more happy to be apart of  such a memorable occasion. Boy let me tell ya, it wasn't half of what I expected being my first out of the family wedding, but not in a bad way.

      She has been my right hand woman, my best friend, my confidant, the person I could tell pretty much anything for. Bekka was like my person at school that always got me, knew how to make me laugh, calm me down, and tell me when I was being stupid. I miss her to pieces not being here at school but I know she has helped make me the mature person I am today at school, and maybe helped me love animals a little more.. not a big fan they freak me out.

      Like Bekka always does surprise me she asked me to be a bridesmaid, but not in the good old Pintrest kinda way... but the Snapchat kinda way. I also missed it the first time I had to replay it, then I cried, then I called her! Couldn't have been happier and more surprised.

      A few months later me, the bridesmaids, friends, and sorority sisters took on Philly for her Bachelorette party. Needless to say, we had a wild, memorable, and interesting time taking on the city of brotherly love. 
       The wedding came quicker than ever. Bekka made the most beautiful bride, and Nick was a handsome groom. They make the most perfect couple I have ever seen and I truly admire their love. They make me aspire to find a love like theirs. It doesn't come around often, but they make me hope to find it. Being at the wedding Bekka, Kerri, other sisters and I were all able to reunite and come together to help celebrate the very happy wedding. I wouldn't trade this experience for the world. 






       Bekka, thank you for stepping in and being such a great Fig/ Big to me. If it wasn't for you I would be so lost in many things especially Biology. You are one of the sweetest, kindest, most perfect people I have ever met. I know you and Nick are going to be so happy. I really can't wait til I see you next. I wish you lived closer but know I am never too far, thank God for cell phones. I love you to the moon and back! LITP <3

Unconditionally

As I posted last week, I lost somebody that I loved dearly. I had never met anybody like him and he meant the world to me. Overnight everything changed and within 36 hours of his accident, he passed away.

It was during the weeks following his death that I received more love and support from my sisters than I ever could have imagined. The day that he passed away, two of my sisters came into the room I was having a meeting in and they brought me flowers and cookies. Within 20ish minutes from those two coming in, four more sisters came in with more flowers, more cookies, and Starbucks. I had already been overwhelmed with what I was feeling but this really made me break down. For the first time in my life, I had the undying support of all of my friends. After getting home from my meeting, the doorbell rang and my roommate (and best friend) answered the door. In came two more sisters with flowers, cookies, and chocolate flowers.

As the week went on, I attempted to force myself to get on with my life. For days, I wouldn't go out. That Friday night, I went to a haunted house and to the movie theater with some of my sisters and one of my sisters, a new member who hasn't known me but for a few weeks, gave me a card and chocolate.

It really hit me at that time...I'm apart of the greatest support system in the world. I'm a greek. I have the greatest friends on the planet. I have 40 women who I can call, day or night, and I know they'll answer the phone.

Nothing bothers me more than when people say, "you pay for your friends!"

No..I don't pay for my friends. Never have I ever paid for the love and support that I receive day in and day out. I didn't pay for the unconditional love that I have received since I came into this organization when I was a sophomore in Spring 2012.

I have never in my life had friendships like the ones that I've made while I've been in Phi Sig. In my time that I've been in Phi Sig, I've found my best friends, my partners in crime, my future bridesmaids, and ultimately, I've found my soulmates.

I met my two best friends because we all came into Phi Sig 6 months apart. The three of us have served on executive board for two terms. I live with one and the other one may as well live with us because we're always together anyway. I have the two best littles and I have just recently received the best grand little into my family. I've had the two best rosebuds that I could have ever asked for that have been there through everything with me.

I ultimately have everything that I ever really needed. I lost love in a very tragic way, but I was also blind to see that I had people around me the entire time that loved me when I was at my worst. I've had people that would hold me while I cry and bring me the unhealthiest of food, even when I didn't need it.

I've been blessed to have the most wonderful support systems of all.

Don't forget to tell your loved ones that you love them and that you care. Don't forget to savor every minute you have with them because you never know if things could change. Embrace those around you, because whether you realize it or not, you have the most wonderful of people around you who will love you unconditionally.

Sunshine on a Cloudy Day

I've found myself in a hole lately. I'm still dealing with the loss of my little sister, and I've had some other personal obstacles which have all pressured me down into a slump. I have searched for hope and sunshine in the dark days, but it's not always easy to find it. 

Something that has always made me happy in my sorority, are the candlelights. A candlelight happens when a sister becomes engaged and it's a special moment of connection when your whole sorority feels a sense of true bonding and excitement. You can truly feel the happiness and the freshness of a new chapter in your sister's life. I haven't experience many in my time as an active, but that makes them even more special. And that happiness that they bring is why I love them so much. 

I've spent weeks searching for a happy moment like that to see, something to just give me a little hope for the day and today I found this. No it's not a sorority girl, it's not a video of a candlelight, but it's that same feeling and the same joy. The bonds Tiffany and her friends share even after they have parted from college (just like you and your sisters will) are so strong and the video is so touching and happy. So take 10 minutes today, watch, enjoy, and have a little ounce of sunshine. I promise you'll love it. 

http://candlelightfilms.com/the-perfect-proposal/

The Realization of a Senior

     

      It is around this time every year that all the sororities begin to give their new members all their lovely Bigs. Tis the season for love, smiles, laughter, and lots and lots of pictures. This past Thursday was our chapters Big/ Little reveal and all I did was cry... I smiled on the outside and started crying when it was over. 

       I became a Great Grand Big... like what? I am old, I am a senior, I am almost done with college! This is so unbelievable and I am so stunned by this fact. Today was my first official day in the classroom to something similar as Student Teaching. It is finally hitting me the fact that by this upcoming Spring I will be graduated. I will be a real professional, with a diploma, with the potential to have a real world job. 

        Recruitment, Big/Little reveal, Initiation and much more will become part of my memories. I love my sorority, I love my chapter, and I love college. I can't wait to become a teacher but becoming a real independent woman scares me to death. Until then I will just sit back, hangout with my sisters, love my GG babies and have the time of my life!

Until next time,
xoxo Brooke

 

Refection: Being in Sorority Post-Grad

It still sometimes hard to believe that I graduated from college over a year and a half ago, in many ways if feels just yesterday and in other ways it feels like a lifetime ago.

  Granted, I was at Pace University and extra year perusing my masters’ degree in Media Communications Arts, but I was also a graduate assistant in the Greek Life office and thus could not be active.

When I was a graduated assistant, my main goal was to not only do a good job but to also ensure that it never appeared that I was playing favorites, specifically with my chapter. Luckily, there were two people in my position.  Will, my PIC (partner in crime) was also Greek while he was on campus. Thus, I guess it was easy for the Assistant Director of Greek Life to have us work with different councils than we were apart of.  This means I worked with cultural organizations and Will worked with social organizations.

Though I was unable to be active, I did see my sisters often, in the office, in the cafeteria, at events and when I was free to hang out.  It was always nice to spend time with them and catch up. 

This past weekend I went back to Pace to see my sisters at one of their events. Even now, when I am not on campus, I never feel weird about seeing them. It is never awkward; it is always like picking up where I left off. To me, that proves the power of sisterhood.  

So in reflection, the power if sisterhood lies in the relationships you build while you are there. Yes, your chapter will be constantly evolving but so long as you foster relationships long after your graduation year, you will always feel apart of your organization forever. Remember: The faces may change but the memories off how everyone connects.